Hello Sadgurlz!
In my last newsletter, I shared that I’ve been sick with a mystery illness since the end of December. I appreciate everyone who sent positive energy my way! I am unfortunately still sick, but the good news is I am slowlyyyy getting better. 🥳 I’m even more hopeful than I was last week that I can beat…whatever this is.
Do I still believe I’ve been poisoned by something that’s affecting my nervous system? Uh, YES. And that is why I’m documenting my experience with this. This is spooky af, and I want a public record of everything just in case.


Anyway, I’ve never felt anything like this in my life. I’ve lost fourteen pounds (my thick era is over, sigh). My head feels like it’s been jackhammered, stuffed with cotton, and thrown to sea. The dizziness and fatigue I feel every day is so overwhelming. My muscles are so sore, and I still can’t drive.
But!! My heart rate is slightly lower, and I can walk longer distances. I can also sleep through the night. Baby steps. I was able to leave Georgia, so I’m hoping being in a different environment continues to help. I need to be healed by Valentine’s Day! Yes, despite all this, I’m still a lover girl, and I have plans I really don’t wanna have to cancel 😂.
Thank you to everyone who shared their stories of black mold poisoning, etc, with me. It’s wild that this kind of thing happens. I’m sincerely hoping it’s black mold or a gas leak and not something else………but…who knows….*cue creepy music* Anyway…
Health Care is still health-caring.
People have mentioned the disparity of care between men and women and between Black and non-Black patients in medical spaces. And I’ve seen it firsthand. For three weeks, my primary care doctor refused to refer me to a neurologist. Any time I asked, she would brush me off and say there was nothing that led her to believe I was having neuro issues…even though I was describing neuro issues.
In between begging for a referral, I ended up at Urgent Care four times. Each time they made me feel like I was conjuring up these symptoms through the power of my “anxiety”. I must have eventually said the right combination of words, or they were sick of me showing up because I was finally referred. And guess what? The neurologist looked at my scan, looked me in the eye, and said, “I can tell you that this is not all in your head.” She told me what she thought it could be, then ordered a barrage of tests that I’m still waiting on. Had I listened to those dismissive doctors and stopped advocating, I would have never made the small progress that I have.
This same struggle to be heard and believed nearly killed Serena Williams. And if doctors won’t listen to the GOAT, do any of us stand a chance? Sigh.
In the meantime...
It’s been a tough few months. And my books are unfortunately delayed, which I feel terrible about. They will come out this year, though. I promise! Since I’m sick and haven’t been able to move on to my other work, here’s a reminder that How to Be a Better Adult is still free to download. Yes, free!
Share it with whoever you think would like it. I’ll likely be pushing it until I start to heal from whatever is happening to me. So, if anyone out there thinks it’s annoying and wants me to stop, please manifest that I feel better or send me a cure 😂 Because being sick and in pain all day leaves me with not much else to do but think about how this could have happened, call doctors, and push send on Twitter.
Some positivity!
Victoria Monet is a grammy winner at 34! After working for 15 years! In an industry where youthfulness is celebrated, seeing someone become a star in their 30’s is incredible to see. Her story is inspirational. It is never too late to reach your goals.
Nothing can make me hate Miley Cyrus! Her Grammy performance was incredible.
Look at these cute body butters!
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Listen to my girly podcast!: The Magical Girl’s Guide to Life
Read my nerdy self-help book!: The Magical Girl’s Guide to Life
Follow me on Instagram!: @ Jacqueaye
wishing you a well recovery <3
Missed the last newsletter so I’m late but super sorry you’re going through this girly!! :( sending you loves of love and positivity! After have kids I def know what you mean about the differences in treatment of black women /: I’m glad you’re advocating for yourself!! Don’t stop! And if possible, have a designated person that can advocate for you when you can’t or are tired. I’m glad things are slowly looking up and hope that you’re all good to go for your Valentine’s Day plans! 🫶🏽🩷✨
P.s. I’m also so happy for Victoria Monet! Love her music and how dedicated she’s been to her craft. And also could never hate Miley 😆