Three things I did this week to like myself better.

It's the little things.

Yes. I do indeed suffer from the phenomenon of “crashing out” online when I feel emotionally stirred. I’ll share, in my very verbose way, just how I’m feeling and why. I paint my feed with woefulness and longing. I’m not afraid to look weak or overwhelmed, either. Back in my day, we called it venting. And almost everyone did it in their own way. Today? Everything and everyone is a brand. It’s all curated. And showing raw vulnerability online can be bad for business.

I’m a woman with many challenges, as many of us are. Some of my challenges are worse than others. Some are par for the course. But they’re mine and I’m the one who has to live with them.

Anywho, after crying, sulking, and licking my wounds, I deleted the post I shared. I was feeling like no one cared (they kind of don’t) and that it didn’t matter anyway (does anything matter?). And instead, I turned inward and decided to take action.

Here are three things I did to like myself better this week…

I went to a Tyler, the Creator concert! My third one. And I’ll likely be at the next tour. And the next. And the next. The streak shall not be broken!

Something about being in a dark room, surrounded by fans, with music blasting, and my hips seemingly rolling on their own just makes me feel alive. Maybe not in a human sense. But my spirit was definitely having the time of its life. Or…lives? Who knows.

Also! Thanks to the concert, I discovered a new fave dopamine band—Paris Texas! They opened for Tyler, and they had me so hype! Check them out.

I took cutesy photos! I love Wes Anderson aesthetics. So, I booked a studio and had a little whimsical photoshoot. I always bring a copy of one of my novels so the shoot has a “purpose”, but really I just had the urge to be creative. And I had to get the energy out somehow.

I ended up recording a little trailer for How to Be a Better Adult. You can watch it here! I told myself I’d make things for fun, and if it hits, it hits. If it doesn’t, oh well! I know some of the things I’m into lean on the weirder side of weird, but I need to stop caring and simply embrace what brings me joy.

I continued reading a book I’ve been enjoying. After struggling through a novel I couldn’t really get into, I decided to DNF it and pick this one back up instead! In “If Cats Disappeared from the World”, our main character doesn’t have much time to live. Or, he could. If he makes a deal with the man down under…

Check it out! It’s only 176 pages, and you all know I love novellas, ha.

I also met strangers, took more cute pics, had great food, and posted way too much on Threads. And in the end? I felt so much better. My life is still the same. But at least I’m calmer at this moment, ha.

Also! Last post I wrote about dating and how awkward and disappointing it’s been.

Black, bi, & shy in Japan.

The update? There was no return. I f*cked it up. And Glasses fell off the face of the Earth. I’ll definitely write more at a later date, ha. But honestly? I’ve been feeling very sane lately, so maybe it’s a sign I should just…I don’t know…focus on me.

What will you do this week to like yourself better?

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