Prince Bojji & the loneliness of difference.

It's not easy feeling "othered"

In Ranking of Kings, Bojji is a young prince who can’t hear or speak. When we meet him, he’s robbed of his clothing by a shadow creature, Kage, but he doesn’t mind. He ends up voluntarily giving them up because he doesn’t value them in the same way others do. This is a move that, well, moves Kage.

As he returns to his palace, the townspeople see him, mocking him behind his back (and in front of his face). And when he reaches home, his family and courtiers ridicule him as well, labeling him incompetent and embarrassing. He smiles through it all.

But when he’s alone in his room, he cries to himself. No one knows he can read lips and that he understands every insult that’s been hurled at him. Only Kage sees this side of him.

In a world where kings are all-powerful and consumed with the desire to become the strongest, someone like Bojji just doesn’t fit in. And it’s so heartbreaking to see how cruel people can be when they think you don’t understand or you’re not catching on.

This is the reality for those shunned by others because of our “differences”.

I’m no stranger to feeling othered. Like Bojji, I’ve had moments where people who claimed to “love me so much” have insulted me passive-aggressively, expecting me not to notice. I’ve also had times I could tell a group had been discussing me because the energy and how I was treated shifted ever-so-slightly. At my last job, I heard whispers that I just knew were about me. And the next day, my intuition was confirmed, as a co-worker let me know the others had found my social media and were making fun of me.

Because I’m both an anxious woman who goes non-verbal when overwhelmed and a person who seems confident online…I tend to confuse people. They expect me to be super social, but in reality, I keep to myself. Instead of thinking I could possibly be shy/socially anxious/neuro-divergent, they think I must not like them, and when people feel threatened in this way it leads to lashing out.

But the more people strike at you, the more you distance yourself, and the more you distance yourself, the more shunned you become because you’re not integrating with the group.

This is why it’s so important to find your people. Don’t work for acceptance from those who can’t see you for who you are. It won’t ever feel right. Once Bojji makes a true friend who sees him for all he is, who encourages and pushes him, who supports his dream…he flourishes and shines!

It’s been tough, but I’ve also found my people. And trust me when I say I’m holding them tight. Because after being taunted and excluded, feeling understood and accepted is a beautiful thing. If you’re currently fighting for acceptance, sit and rest. Then keep pushing by being your authentic self. It will be lonely, but the people you meet…the true friends drawn to your light...will be worth it.

How to Be a Better Adult…the audiobook is coming!

I’m collaborating with a wonder Black narrator for How to Be a Better Adult’s audiobook, coming August 28th! Here’s more about Jynelle!

Jynelle Brown is a professionally trained voice-over actor with experience in Audiobook Narration, Storytelling, Meditations, Producing, Singing and more. She is naturally curious and loves learning and sharing new experiences and knowledge with her voice and a nice spot of tea.

And here’s a preview of the audiobook:

How exciting!!! I can’t wait!

Another exciting update?

My Kickstarter is on track to hit a stretch goal!

If we raise $10,000, our artist will be able to add manga panels to the novel. The goal is to hit $8,000 today. Do you think we can do it? 😲 Check it out!

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