Doja Cat went to therapy ❤️🔥
Plus, untethering yourself from the opinions of others
I’ve been a Doja Cat fan for a long time—even before her bovine bop Mooo!. I’ve always loved her unapologetically goofy personality, and as her Hot Pink era dominated 2020, I was inspired by her confidence, work ethic, and creativity. It was back-to-back hits, incredible live performances, and stunning looks over and over and over and over again…
I was entertained. The world was entertained. And Doja? Was reaching burnout.
With every ascent comes the struggle to balance it all. To balance the demands of the people above you. Balancing the expectations of supporters. Stretching yourself thin to capture your moment and not let it pass you by. Doja Cat was clearly tired and overworked, and I’m sure logging onto the internet to escape reality for a bit after working so hard, just to see floods of criticism, didn’t help.
As a depressed girlie recovering from burnout and other things, I can’t imagine the mental anguish she went through. You finally achieve your dreams, only to have everything about you scrutinized and picked apart on the world’s stage.
Doja sets herself free
In 2022, she’d finally had enough. And in an act of reclaiming her power, Doja Cat shaved her hair and eyebrows. She experimented more with her style as well. This led to an uproar of people lamenting the “old Doja”. They wanted hyper-feminine Doja, with her sparkly outfits and long wigs. But that’s not what Doja Cat wanted.
This tweet was such a mood. Because why does she have to look a certain way to please anyone but herself? She’s an accomplished performer. Has reached the highest peaks of success in her career. And people still want her to perform an idea of herself offstage? Weird.
Redirection
A few days ago, Doja Cat released a new music video—Attention. With a totally different sound and look, she addresses everything. The people who follow her every move just to criticize her but don’t care about her music. The people who claim she’s less sexually desirable thanks to her new cropped haircut. And the ones who said she needed to “seek help” in the form of therapy.
I’m an oversharing open book who’s struggled with major depression, so I’m no stranger to hearing “seek help,” and let me tell you…it’s rarely said in good faith. When people see someone struggling and they genuinely want to help, you’ll feel it. They pull you aside, talk to you privately, and share their own stories of overcoming sad times. But when they want to make a spectacle of you, or feel bigger than you, they snarkily tell you to seek help on a public platform. And that’s what was happening to Doja Cat.
When people grieve, they want their grief seen and acknowledged. Having your sad feelings validated by another person is a form of community building. It can be so lonely dealing with so much on your own, and being embraced by others, even with tears in your eyes, makes you feel less isolated.
An overworked and vulnerable Doja Cat shared her grief with us. She expressed her frustrations on Twitter. She performed an act of freedom and self-love on Instagram Live with us. She sought community and understanding…just to be ridiculed every step of the way. I can only imagine how isolating that must have felt.
Doja goes to therapy
In Attention, Doja Cat shares that she’s found a therapist…and I was so happy to hear it!
I love that she took the steps to find someone to talk to who could hear her and see her. I love that she’s detaching from the criticism, taking a step back, and realizing how the people hurling the most sh*t at her are in their own season of hurt. She could have slandered everyone, honestly. But instead, she sincerely expressed that she sees the hurt in those who seek to hurt her. What an empowering realization.
The whole song is a triumph. A beautiful expression of regaining confidence, detaching from the expectations of others, and creating what you feel. A lesson I’m currently learning myself!
What do you think of Doja Cat’s new song?
Things to know!
The subscriber giveaway will begin July 1st! Only paid subscribers can enter this one. It’s a way for me to express gratitude!
An audiobook version of “How to Be a Better Adult” is in the works. Also—I finally reached 100 ratings on Amazon. I’ll celebrate by eating snacks and watching Black Mirror, ha
A newly birthed book club, Baked Book Club, chose my book as their first read! I love the concept 🍃
If you’re in NY, check out this Sailor Moon Day Party hosted by Sailor Moon Fan Club on July 1st!
The last of the hardcover pre-orders will be shipped by July 15th!
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Listen to my girly podcast!: The Magical Girl’s Guide to Life
Read my nerdy self-help book!: The Magical Girl’s Guide to Life
Follow me on Instagram!: @Jacqueaye
I personally also love Doja Cat. Her creativity and her visuals are on a whole other level that I don't think we've seen in a really long time. Although I haven't heard her new song, I'm sure it's fantastic. Also Doja's new look slaps.